Take Down That Memorials! By Force

In doing some more research about other roadside memorials out there, I came across a news story from Chattanooga, TN. I'll condense it to the following:

The debate over a roadside memorial continues in Hixson... The families of three young women, killed in a a car wreck... set up a memorial...neighbors keep taking it down... people who live in the West Point Subdivision are voicing concerns... Linda Denton lost her daughter in the crash and says this memorial is not only about mourning her loss but also educating the public on safety... Some neighbors say... its a distraction to drivers, while others said the moms should be able to put up a memorial...

The comments to this story really covers all the sentiments that are associated with roadside memorials. The gamut runs from sympathizing with the families to total outrage & anger. Either way it is emotionally charged. One comment posted, I think, really hits the nail on the head.

Sue Shepherd wrote:

"...A memorial won't bring them back and will just clutter up the roadway. Imagine if every death in an automobile was memorialized along the road, there wouldn't be a space without a cross."

Maybe that is the point! If we really were aware to the fact that over 50,000 people die in America every year from vehicular accidents - we would be shocked. But we only see it in bits and pieces - one news story here & there.

I was not aware of the math and no I did not have it in perspective. So if that number does not register with you, then imagine that in the whole Vietnam War we lost 58,177 soldiers! And each year we are loosing almost that many neighbors, friends, brothers, sisters, mothers & fathers - and yes kids. Families are loosing CHILDREN! and that is the point for making the grieving and the memorials VERY public.

I hate to admit it - but the memorials are a daily reminder of our own mortality - I know I did not want to see that! But if you notice, memorials are popping up more and more. Every day in my search for new markers, I find new ones. I can honestly say that, sad as it may sound, I will have plenty of material to write about and to photograph in the near future.

So take the families' message for what it is and just DRIVE SAFELY!

Map of Roadside Memorials

I just started a new map of the Roadside Memorials that i've documented to date. Many are part of the Descansos.org project webpage plus many more that I have not been able to update.

Updating the images will be an on-going process so check back soon. Also I will make it a permanent link on the "Links" side bar. ---->

Please take a look - maybe you might even see one in your area.

For Virginia :: Memories of Virginia

Tonite an email arrived that pulled at all my emotions. It reads ::

"Señor, I have maintained my daughter's roadside marker for 14 years now. I will soon be gone as well. It was important for me, in the waning years of my life, to be able to speak with her at the place she last spoke on Earth. I know that this memorial means nothing to anyone but I, and I will soon vanish from existence."

David just wanted to talk & express his story of the pain, sorrow & heartache, he has experienced at the loss of his daughter.

He seemed lonely, but most of all heartbroken. I am getting the impression that he just want to share his story with someone, before he goes.

All I can do is listen with all my heart.

Baby Grace :: Experience the Twinkle and Sparkle of Life

I just received a preliminary sketch of Baby Grace's roadside memorial. I'm really excited that Nancy B. decided to assist me on this project by preparing this sketch. I plan to make a presentation of this roadside memorial to Andy P. to see if he would allow me to place this memorial at the entry to his recycling plant.

So you may be asking yourself why I would do this for a child I never knew. This baby was not a relative of mine - I don't even know what she looks like. My answer honestly has to be "I don't know!"

I don't have a valid reason for doing it... nor can I even justify an excuse for NOT doing it. I don't know why or for what reason, I just know it's something I must do. If I don't do it then who will!?? Who will make sure that her death was not in vain.

See Baby Grace died without a mother to acknowledge her, no family to take care of her body and in spite of that - she did not die alone. The twinkle of a newborn's life was not lost on the factory worker that found her body. The sparkle her life had to offer is NOT wasted - it is recycled back to the universe! Back into you & I.

The way I see it is that this little angel came into this world to show us that a single soul - in one day of life - actually made a difference in our humanity by touching many lives! She made an impact in the lives of the recycling plant owner who was inspired to pay for the funeral; on the 50 people compelled to go to the funeral of a child they did not know; and she made an impact on my life! She has touched more people in her single day of life than many of us allow ourselves in a whole lifetime.

What her life inspired in me is to :
Imagine what I can do with the years of my life...

How many people, in my life, do I actually have a positive impact on? How many people do I leave them in better spirits/ feelings/ state of mind, then when I first met them? I yelled at my son before leaving the house; at the gas station I tossed the cash on to the counter; on the road I cut somebody off really close. See, like many of us, I live my life like I don't have time, I'm too busy running my business - too busy needing to make a living - too busy raising a family, that I do not have time to care about the other.

This is not living - that's surviving!

I am too busy with the everyday stuff that... I forgot to live life to its fullest. Forget to appreciate what & who is really around me in my life. I know the postman got a 'get out of my way' look this morning.

So from what I see missing, I am inventing the possibility of...
experiencing the Twinkle and Sparkle that life has to offer each and every one of us...

With this new insight on life & with the experience of Baby Grace's life, I can really see that experiencing what life has to offer would really be living life to the fullest. Enjoying every moment like it really matters... because it really does.

"Carpe Diem! Seize the day, lads! Make your lives extraordinary!"

"--Dead Poets Society